Well, today is my one week anniversary of sobriety. Not only have I not had a lick of alcohol but I have also not had even a drag of a cigarette. It feels good. I just feel so much better. As for my teeth, I was unable to find any help getting CareCredit, so I will just deal with the pain and wait it out until I can get my credit back to normal. It jumped from 517 to 570 this month and I am making more progress so it should jump higher next month as well. I am really trying my hardest to get well and be a good person.
Well, I went to the dentist today and got the rundown. I guess after insurance and everything it is going to cost me $4855. On one hand that's a lot, but on the other hand I was really expecting it to be more like $20,000. My friend had his teeth all fixed and it cost him $14,000 and I know a guy who paid almost $30,000. So, all of my fronts are just fine (6 on top, 12 on bottom), but all of my wisdom teeth have to go. There are about 4 other teeth that need to go. Luckily on three sides I have enough teeth left or savable that she can bridge my top right, but I will need an implant on the top left to bridge that side. No big deal. My first real appointment is on Monday but I'm probably going to have to miss it because without CareCredit I have to pay the cost upfront. How is it that I can go to the hospital and get major surgery or whatever and they can just bill me, but when it comes to dental it's PAY NOW. It's stupid. More people would get their teeth fixed if they could just make payments. It's frustrating. I have my mind set on getting better. I still haven't smoked or drank and I am feeling SO good and positive. I have lost almost 10 pounds this week. I drink homemade fruit smoothies for breakfast and lunch (they are SO good and filling) and I have a good dinner. I have been working out like crazy even making a workout journal to keep track of my non-Wii progress and my diet and I am even enrolling in The University of Phoenix to take online classes in either IT Networking OR Human Services. Things are going great. All I need is a co-signer. No money or anything. Just a co-signer to help me get CareCredit. They say it will come down to $116/ month payments for everything to get done. If anyone could help that would be the greatest gift of all.
Guess whos teeth are acting up now? Kaiti's. It wasn't enough that I have been up for the past three nights moaning and groaning, now Kaiti is in major pain. I gave her a Vicodin but it didn't help much. I got up early this morning, put the kids in the car and headed out to Comfort Dental again. My mouth was on fire because I couldn't take a pain killer before we left because I would've crashed the car. Painkillers and me, we're friends and all, but we don't do too much besides sleep. So we get there and I'm corralling the kids while Kaiti is being attended to. Now, I thought I hated the dentist. Kaiti HATES the dentist. I don't mind the extractions and drills and things like that, but keep that little scraper away from me. Stop puncturing me teeth and ripping up my gums. So, they gave Kaiti the option of a root canal for $1200 or an extraction for $125. She decided on the extraction after we both failed the application for CareCredit. She started to have an anxiety attack and the dentist turned into a real "donkey". He tried to just ram the needle into her mouth and she was like, "hold up!". He was rude, gave her a referral and a prescription and then mocked her for not being able to pay for the root canal. We left and will never go back to that office. I had a different experience at another Comfort Dental that was very pleasant and the dentist and assistants really seemed to care and were sensitive to my needs. I would have taken her there but the insurance that I just got wasn't good there and I was going to have to find another office anyway. Long story short: I came home, ditched my current insurance and signed us both up for Careington Dental which is accepted by the Comfort Dental I originally went to. I have to get an extraction tomorrow as long as this swelling is gone by then and we will set Kaiti up for a root canal that will cost her $221 under this insurance. Oh, and I have to miss work again. These next two weeks are going to be exciting.
Life sure is complicated. I had to miss work last night because of the condition of my mouth and face and today is worse. I have been up all night and my face this morning looks like I have a softball in my cheek. Not good. So it looks like another day off for me. This sucks.
Enough is enough. Since I have been drinking at a MUCH slower pace, like once or twice a week, my teeth have been screwing with me. They have always been bad but as long as I'm drinking, they are happy. I have been having toothache after toothache recently and it's just been getting worse. I hate my teeth. The fronts aren't too bad but the backs are just a whole cluster of roots and shards and I am done with it. So, my mouth started swelling today and usually if I have a beer, the swelling goes away. But I'm feeling like a new Micah these days. I am so determined to be smokin' hot for myself and my beautiful wife that I decided that now is the time. I have 7 months to get right. That's plenty of time as long as I'm doing it the right way. So I went to Comfort Dental and for $19 they did a very extensive review of my mouth, X-Rays and all. I was prescribed the usual (Amoxicillin and Vicodin) and a medicated mouthwash to help fix my periodontal gum disease. I go back on Saturday morning to get at least one extraction and to go over my personalized plan that my dentist is preparing for me tonight. She said the bottoms can be salvaged but I'll probably have to have 5 more extractions. So, Bridges and crowns and root canals and even implants are in the near future. I'm over it. I don't care about the pain anymore. I just want to be normal again. On the workout front, I recieved my Mario Lopez Knock-Out Fitness book today as well as my Men's Health workout video that came with my subscription. So that's exciting. I'm telling you that the old Micah is history. I haven't even smoked a single cigarette in 2 days. That's a start. I'll keep you all updated.
So I went without exercise for 6 days because there has been a lot going on and when I stepped onto my Wii this morning I had gained 2 pounds. I guess that's no big surprise though. I was eating alot, and there was Valentines day at the Cheesecake factory.
We definately took advantage of that delicious food. The bill was the only unappetizing thing at the place. Oh, and the 2 hour wait to get a table. But once we got sat it was on. It was Jonah and Jen and Kaiti-bean and me. We started out with some scrumptuos lettuce wraps and Buffalo snackers. Then we each had a ceasar salad(except Kaiti had a plain ol' house salad). After that we had our main course. Kaiti had a combo of Steak Diane and Jumbo Shrimp, I had Orange Chicken, Jonah had some steak concoction and Jen had a Skirt steak or something. For dessert, Kaiti and I had the Tuxedo cheesecake and Jonah and Jen got the Cookie Dough Cheesecake. Man it was good. BUT, fattening.
So I took a step backwards.
I am still having trouble with booze, but I am finding that I can go days without it now. I hope to be beer free soon. I'm not making any excuses but before I would drink every chance I had. If I got off at 11:55 and the liquor store was still open, I'd be there. If I had the day off, I was drinking. I'm getting alot better at coming home and getting into bed with my wife and actually spending time with them on my days off. It's just going to take time. But come wedding time, I will be a new man.
Like I said in my last post, Kaiti and I have decided on October 3rd, 2009 as our wedding date. It's on a Saturday and the ceremony will be early. Like 11 AM or so. That way, the Country Club waives the $1800 room and site fee. We wanted October because we are both in love with the colors of Autumn and the way the trees look and the leaves skipping across the street and the brisk mountain air that gives us relief from the summer heat.
We decided on an early October because we still wanted a little September warmth to it. I decided to look up our wedding date on Yahoo! to see what other events took place on that date. Here's a few:
1955: The MICKEY MOUSE CLUB begins airing
1964: Buffalo Wings are first made at the Anchor Bar in Buffalo, New York
1985: Space Shuttle Atlantis is launched
1990: East and West Germany reunite.
1995: OJ Simpson found "not guilty"
2003: Roy Horn of "Siegfried & Roy" is attacked by his white tiger
2008: $700 Billion bailout signed by George W. Bush
That's pretty fun to look that kind of stuff up. It also happens to be the birthday of a few of Kaiti's favorite people: Ashlee Simpson, Gwen Stefani and Tommy Lee.
Anyway, Mt Vernon said it's fine if we want to use outside vendors so that means that Hannah better start planning a beautiful wedding cake for us. That was a big deal to me because I really wanted her to, but alot of places wouldn't let us use anything but what they had. So, Hannah: We would be honored if you would make us a fancy cake. I'm not sure if it should be autumnal like these:
Or, just elegant.
You'll have to help me out on this one. But I trust the cake will be amazing no matter what.
Also, I am going to need Adam to be the photographer/videographer (even though I never saw any footage of our family reunion).
I prefer to keep it in the family because we know each other and everything will have that "familiarity" to it instead of working with overpriced strangers.
Kaiti, Taylor and Janelle are making the invitations, I'm using my new iPod to make a playlist for the reception. We will probably be using Kaitis dad's projector for some of the dances. I have this strange image of the music video playing on a huge screen while the dance is going on. For instance:
For Kaiti and her Dads dance I chose "My Little Girl" by Tim McGraw.
At some point I want to slow dance with my new bride to this. I love the lyrics. I don't believe it's about a love gone bad as much as it is about going with your heart and taking a chance. Like he says at the end, "I wouldn't miss this for the world."
Also, the groomsmen and groom (Noah, Jonah, Zach and I) will battle the bridesmaids and bride to the "Evolution of Dance", and for our last dance, Kaiti and I are doing "Time of Your Life" from Dirty Dancing. I can't guarantee it will be good or even happen for that matter, but it's one of her wishes.
It's gonna be crazy. They want to do the "Thriller" dance too.
Also, I was contacted by Tore this morning and he was upset that I hadn't told him about the wedding yet. Really, I hadn't told anyone besides family yet. The invites will be in the mail when the time is right. That's be so exciting if he came. He is my best friend afterall and I haven't seen him in like 8 years. Kaiti is inviting Patrick Swayze and his wife Lisa. I'm not sure if they're gonna come or not yet :)
Alright, time to work out. I am gonna sweat this week like I've never sweated before.
Just a quick update: Kaiti and I went to Mt Vernon yesterday and it was stunning. So, Mt Vernon it is. Our official date is set for OCTOBER 3RD,2009. Hopefully everyone can make it. It'd really mean alot. You are all invited.
Almost five years ago you were almost killed in a car crash right outside my work. I have fuzzy memories of the day that it happened because I did not know you then. But fate brought us together and we have been going strong ever since. Thank you for being my very best friend. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for allowing me to love you. Above all though, thank you for your patience. I am a real handful and I know that. I am trying to get better for you because I know you deserve the very best. I know I will get there. You have been my rock and my heart for the past 4 years. Although we have had some rocky times, we have always gotten through them together. Please remember that I love you wholeheartedly yesterday, today and forever. I can't wait for our wedding day. Nothing is better to me than laying in bed with my favorite girl, running my fingers through your hair and massaging your hip as we fall asleep. You're the reason I wake up. You're the reason I smile, cry and laugh. It's crazy to think back to that day and wonder where my life would be at this point had I never met you or had you died. I like to say that where your life nearly ended, ours began. I am so grateful for you. Everyday I am thankful. You are my strength and my heart and I will continue to do right for you and protect you. Thank you for our beautiful children. They are so perfect and they are a direct reflection of you. You are a great mother and our babies love you so much. Thank you for everything baby. Although I have saved your life several times, it was truly you who has saved mine. I love you Kaiti-bean. Happy Valentines Day.
We're not sure yet, but I'd say we're pretty sure. We found a place in the mountains of Golden, CO that has so much to offer our wedding. It is BREATHTAKING. Surrounded by trees for miles and miles (which in the fall are going to be just perfect) and the best view of the Rocky Mountains I have ever seen. The place said that if we have our wedding on a Saturday between 8AM-4PM, they would waive the room rental fee. That's what I like to hear. I don't know how we are going to pay for everything but Kaiti's stepmom is being very generous and helpful in our planning. We won't have all the bells and whistles and we will skimp wherever we can, but I REALLY want the wedding to be special. I am only getting married ONE time, and fortunately for me it's to the most beautiful person I know. Oh, man-I'm so excited. We have been planning our butts off and October just can't come soon enough.
This working out thing was going pretty good until my weigh in yesterday. I had been going to the gym and working out at home and eating less and better and not drinking. I stepped on the scale and after that whole week, I had only lost .2 pounds. Ugh. I started at 187 and Kaiti said I should go down 15 pounds. But the more I think about it, I'd like to get closer to 200. But muscle. Not this belly. I think if I lost 15 pounds, I'd be scrawny and weak. I don't want that. I want to be diesel. I was doing my pushups on the Wii and I remembered how Josiah used to drop down at any given time and ask us "How many pushups should I do?". In any case, I need to lose this stomach, and work out my arms and chest until I can't take the pain anymore.
In other news, Kaiti and I went to our first prospective wedding site. It is a little chapel up on a hill called Three Trees Chapel. It was very cute and it had a nice view out the windows, but the reception hall downstairs was way too small. It was also pretty pricey. So, we keep looking.
As for the wedding, Kaiti and I have been fighting about a few things. She is a Catholic and I am not. Her religion says she can't wear a white wedding dress because she isn't a virgin. That kinda pisses me off. I have been envisioning her walking down the aisle in a stunning white dress with a long train and vail. She says she will wear ivory instead. That's like grayish isn't it? It drives me crazy. Doesn't the song go "Here comes the bride, all dressed in WHITE?" We'd have to change it to OFF-White. It's not the same. Then she thinks the guys should wear sneakers. What kind of wedding are you planning on, babe? That's something you do to be cool at your high school prom, not your wedding. Also, she is determined to have a stripper at her bachelorette party and I really feel strongly against that. I don't feel there is any place for that. It's nasty and if you feel like you need someone else rubbing there privates on you then you have no need to get married. I would never disrespect her that way.
I also feel like I'm the only one who's planning the wedding. I'm online constantly looking at wedding sites and reception sites. We don't even know our budget because she won't ask. There is no sense of urgency on her part and it hurts my feelings. It's like it doesn't even matter. Usually it's the girl who is all into it and excited but not in our case.
I have alot to think about. But for now, it's off to the Wii.
So, that Wii is a real pain in my behind. Literally. I can barely walk. I've done about a half hour of exercises the past two days and I am down 2.9 pounds. My goal was 15 pounds in 2 months, but I think I'm going to smash that. I regret not stretching the first time though because I am having a hard time getting these cramps out. But, so far, so good.
Kaiti and I are looking for a place to get married and we just can't decide. We like Red Rocks, but they only allow you to use their vendors. That won't work for us because her cousin Tony is a photographer, her brothers restaurant can cater, her cousins girlfriend is a make-up artist and I was hoping Hannah would make the cake. So, we have to keep looking. If anyone has any ideas, I'd love to hear them.
Kaiti is doing great in school and only has a few months left. I am so proud of her. I am seriously contemplating online schooling at The University of Phoenix for IT/ Networking or IT/Technology. I've been having a hard time because I really can't afford to pay extra every month for school and the few times I have attempted to get into school, the financial aid would only cover about half. That's great and all, but we're cutting it close as it is. Things will be grand when there are two incomes.
I may have to take the night off tonight because I had the hardest time ever last night getting up and down the stairs at the restaurant. There are about 35-40 stairs to get to the top. Getting up actually was alot easier than getting down the stairs. I need to remember to stretch. This morning I did 750 hula hoop twirls and ran a couple of times through the Wii park. It's great fun.
I need to go rest for a bit and try to get ready for work. Hopefully I'll be good to go.
Ok, Ok... I have been very lazy with this computer thing lately. I just can't muster up the energy to go type. So much has been going on though so it's time for an update.
Kaiti and I consider ourselves "married". We have for a couple of years now. But these dull, scratched sterling silver bands just aren't enough. I really wanted Kaiti to know just how much I love her and so I maxed out a credit card or two at a jewelry store that was going out of business. 70% OFF!!!! I just had to.
We went to the mall to go look at dogs (because one day, I hope to own a baby English Bulldog). Sure it won't be anytime soon, but I love to imagine having my puppy to rassle with and to plop down with us when we watch a movie. The pet store reportedly had a baby girl bulldog and I wanted to go say hi. She was cute, but sick. She was shaking and her eyes were in the back of her head. Plus her price tag was $2600. That's a bit much. But it was fun to hang out with her. Then we took Kenzee to get her ears pierced because she has wanted pink diamond earrings for a long time. She says it would make her look "purfact". It broke my heart when they pierced them because she was clearly in alot of pain. But she got her pink "diamonds" and she loves them now that they don't hurt.
So off we went through the foodcourt and we ran into a blowout sale at a jeweler and Kaiti wanted to just look. I knew that deep down she really wanted a real ring. I've wanted to get her one for a long time but just couldn't afford it. "Nothing too fancy", she said. "Just one diamond on a skinny band". She liked the princess cut diamonds because the settings didn't stand too high off of the band. She had one picked out until she saw the price tag. She then moved down to the small diamonds and started to try them on. We left after a little bit and continued to cruise the mall. I made a quick dash to the jeweler as the girls shopped for girls stuff. I told the lady I wanted to get the ring but I wanted it to be a surprise. She seemed like she understood and was going to help me out with the surprise at first. As I planned out how to pay for the ring, Kaiti found me back at the jeweler. The jeweler lady very rudely told her to leave. "You can leave right now!", she said. But that tipped Kaiti off to my surprise. I paid for the ring but needed it to be sized from a 5 to a 6 1/4. The lady said it would only take an hour or so.
So, I caught up with Kaiti and she was convinced that I had the ring on me. I didn't and I kept telling her that I put a deposit down on it and would have to make payments. She searched me up and down and found no ring. Good. My plan was working.
Then disaster. The jeweler lady tracked Kaiti and I down in the mall and says, "Your ring will be ready in ten minutes."
So whatever. I go to pick up the ring, Kaiti knows I have it. Should I just give it to her? Nah. Let's make her wait it out. Kaiti doesn't like to be surprised. She peeks at all her presents at Christmas time and everything. She just can't stand the anticipation of wondering what something could be.
We had plans that night to go to a bar called Baker Street Pub. It's a nice place located in Belmar. They had a live band playing that night called "Kelli Said". Kaiti thought I had the ring on me and that I would propose to her that night but that's no fun if you already expect it. So, I had to come up with something. I gave the ring to her brother and as we left the house and were on our way, I said,"Crap, I left the ring at home. Let's turn around." She was a little upset but replied,"Don't worry about it. We'll do it tommorrow or something."
I pleaded with her to turn around but we were already close to the bar and she just didn't want to go through the trouble. She was convinced there was no ring. Good.
We walk into the bar and to my surprise, there is like 300 people there watching this band. Super. My brother in law,Zach, and his friend walked up to the band during their break and explain the situation. Very low key. Kaiti and I are enjoying a beverage and dancing a little with the rest of our friends. Zach pulls me aside and says they are cool with me proposing onstage right before their next set. So, we need to make our way towards the stage. Kaiti asks whats going on and why are we going up to the stage.
We tell her some silly story about how we're all going to go up onstage and sing Journey's "Don't Stop Believing". She loves the idea. She sang it at a bar with her sister a few nights before this and it's her new favorite song. We waited anxiously (me mostly). Finally the guitar player comes up to the mic.
"Before we continue, someone has something to announce. Micah, come on up here", he says.
Kaiti starts to come up with me and I tell her to hold on. "You'll be up here in a minute." She is so confused.
I look out on the crowd and I have never been so nervous in my life. I went blank. The whole night I knew exactly what I was going to say. Then I get up there and it's like...uhhh...uhh....
300 strangers staring up at me.
But I managed to get off a few things. I even quoted the movie Max Payne that I had watched the night before. "I don't know about heaven, but I DO believe in angels."
Corny. But c'mon. I got down on one knee and called her up onstage and she said "Yes." I went to put the ring on and it didn't fit. "Seriously?". It was too small by a large margin. But we kissed and laughed and she was mad because she was totally surprised. The audience clapped and whistled and we went on to have a great night.
As for the ring, turns out the lady at the jewelry store never actually sized it. She just wanted to make the sale. I raised hell and they gave me a lifetime warranty on the ring that would've cost me $120 that I didn't have at the time I purchased it. We got it sized and it looks beautiful.
Yay!!! We are planning on getting married this fall and I was hoping everyone would come. Maybe it could be our next family reunion?
Anyway, things are still tough around here but they are getting better. I am very optomistic about the days to come. I am drinking less and I am focusing on getting in better shape. Kaiti bought me a Wii the other day. It was my Christmas present from her since we couldn't get each other a present at the time. She also got me the Wii Fit that Abby seems to love so much. It's pretty fun but it's mostly convenient. Sure you can't lift weights with it, but it has alot of fun stuff and it definately wears you out. It has a journal that keeps track of your fitness goals and what you've achieved so far. The balance board that it comes with is also a scale so it keeps you up to date on your weight loss as well. All in all I really love it.
The sad thing is they have a formula that tells you your "Fitness Age", and I have a 39 year olds fitness level. I'm not sure what that means, because I know alot of 40 year olds who are in great shape. Kaiti however is 42 years old. (HaHa!!). My workout begins today. I was supposed to be up at 7 to start and Kaiti kept trying to wake me up, but the Super Bowl was last night and I partook in a beer or two and I just couldn't do it. But I'm up and as soon as I'm done with this, I will begin.
It's very serious that i focus and do this EVERYDAY. I had my blood pressure taken at the WalMart on one of those do it yourself ones and it read 167/100. However, I think the thing was busted. I know I have high blood pressure but it's never come close to that. As I sat there waiting for the reading, the thing just kept inflating. It wouldn't stop. It hurt very bad, unlike anytime I ever did it before. I wiggled a bit and almost hit the stop button because I thought it was going to make my arm pop.
I'm still young though and I can right this ship. I've been doing alot better.
Oh yeah, just a quick note for anyone who cares, (Mom, you'll love this:)...
Willows mom, Nicole, is pregnant. AND, she is having trouble in her relationship. AND she is trying her darndest to come back to Colorado. Oh man. Life's a bitch ain't it?